Go "Team"!

 

JOHN MCCAIN     vs.       BARACK OBAMA

The 2008 Major League Presidenting Championship

Red versus blue. Elephant versus Donkey. Republican versus Democrat. Dawgs versus Gators. Wait, scratch that last one. Or should we? What we think of as a legitimate race for the White House is nothing more than a glorified sporting event that is perpetuated by the same media outlets that broadcast our beloved true American sporting events. I expect to see four spectacles going on in the Autumns of election years: college & pro football, the World Series, and the Presidential Election. Not that the election doesn't matter, because it does, but how else can one explain why the two "teams" have team colors, mascots, and rabid fans. That sounds much like every sports team in the United States. We identify those oddly enough with colors and mascots. Hmm, noticing a pattern?

Using football as an example because the fan base for a specific team is about as insane as some Americans' passion for their candidate (the star quarterback) and their team (Congressional candidates, other offices, etc.) as we head down to the final weeks. As poll data comes out about how states feel about their stars, we color code those states with "red" or "blue" depending on if they're leaning toward McCain or Obama. When election day hits, the true insanity begins. As the returns come in, the news media will begin to shade in the states based on the state's "score" (who won the state) and battle for 270 electoral votes (the score necessary to win) will become the scoreboard. Watching this is more exciting than the Super Bowl and game 7 of the World Series combined. It's captivating. At this point, I'd much rather have John Madden, Al Michaels, and what the hell, we'll throw in Bob Costas in their to call this "game". Honestly, that is what this all has become.

 For all the decades this fine country has existed our Presidential election system has mainly focused on the "two major parties". Whether this is the Democrats and Republicans or some other bizarre form of political parties that has yet to morph into the spotlight, it comes down to #1 vs. #2. The ultimate battle. The media makes sure we all know that this exists by completely ignoring every other candidate from every other party that somehow manages to make it on the ballot. There are exceptions mind you (namely H. Ross Perot). These exceptions are given airtime because they sell. Perot's massive ears in 1992 clearly were more exciting that a redneck Governor playing saxophone on the Arsenio Hall show or President Bush (the first one) rambling on about reading his lips. Apparently, we're all deaf. So the media hopped on the Perot bandwagon. In the end, it didn't matter, it came down to Red vs. Blue, Elephant vs. Donkey. A further detailing of the sports comparison now begins.

The regular season of the Major League of Presidenting (sorry W. had to borrow it) begins approximately four years before the election. One of the two teams has one leaving the other to regroup. Candidates form their teams to compete is this season so long it makes Major League Baseball seem as short as little league. The hit the road, showing off their new team to all MLP fans as they cheer, wave signs, even those foam fingers, of course in the color of their favorite team. The regular season runs out quickly, usually January of the election year when the primaries begin. This begins the playoffs.

The playoffs eliminate most candidates quickly. They cannot represent their respective league in the championship rounds. The strong teams, in this year's case Obama, Clinton, and on the Red team, John McCain make it. People wear their team apparel with pride, chant, have signs in their yard, waving, screaming acting like Jackasses and Elephants. The first round of the playoffs concludes once you have narrowed down the process to a minimum of two candidates on either side. Obama and Clinton went a strong 7 game series, coming down to a walk-off homerun for Team 'O' that sealed his appearance in the championship. McCain looked down early, but made a major comeback towards the end of the first half and sealed his trip to the championship. The conference playoffs now end leaving us one candidate from either side.

DEMOCRATIC DONKEYS vs. REPUBLICAN ELEPHANTS

              

Barack Obama John McCain

The two team leaders now representing all of their teams and former opponents square off early. The first and second quarters see little action, with advertisements, stump speeches, and TV appearances talking up their team and why we should start rooting for them. At the conclusion of these interviews, TV stations then show a giant digital map of the United States and start coloring in the states. They predict how the game will end, but oh how is just getting started. After a slow first half, the candidates pull out a fast one before half time. RUNNING MATES. One became two, and the team either grows stronger, or begins to show its weakness. The refs blow their whistles, it's half time.

The half time show isn't nearly as exciting as seeing what goes at the Super Bowl, but it's a spectacle. The conventions are four day long half time shows celebrating everything to do with your team. Music and alcohol are included as are pseudo-inspiring speeches from our team leaders as we all shout out: "GO JACKASSES!" or "GO ELEPHANTS!" "WIN THE BIG GAME!" We then begin making out with the person standing next to us, things are just too damn awesome! After that final day however, things begin getting serious.

The two sides, knowing that the game is much closer than anticipated know they are beginning a tough second half and it's going to take some quick scoring in the third quarter. The speeches become more intense, the ads become dirtier (ex. "John McCain is going to use your tax money to gamble!" or "Barack Obama, yes, he's STILL a Muslim!") and we have the top referees get involved with something called debates. Yes folks, this is where we are in the game, so close, yet so far from the buzzer when states begin to decide which "team" they want for the next four years. Our precious media darlings grill both candidates on all sorts of issues. The candidates respond. After these debates, pundits from the media "score" the candidates. 

"Obama or McCain intercepts the ball from McCain or Obama late in the 3rd quarter to take a commanding lead." 

These headlines COULD happen after one of these debates. It's all about the game. November 4th is when the game will end and teams will know if it's time to start rebuilding for the next four years and the other will enjoy being crowned champion of the MLP and get to live in a big white house until the next battle begins. It's not that the election has become a joke, but when you break it all down, that's all it really is. The Super Bowl, World Series, Kentucky Derby, Stanley Cup, the Presidential Election. Hmm, I like it. What do you say folks, Barack Obama or John McCain on the cover of Sports Illustrated depending on the outcome? I mean c'mon the champions of all other sports just get a picture AT the White House. These champions live in it. 

Final note. Here's to the Tampa Bay Rays winning the American League East and hopefully a successful playoff run. 

Happy New Year

It's Rosh Hashanah and being Jewish I've been enjoying New Year's and eating good food. Despite being in synagogue for much of tomorrow, fear not, I have a great substantive post coming tomorrow, so stay tuned sports fans and sorry for the delay. 

By the way, who noticed that the economy decided to give up today?....Anyone? Ok, good, I'm not the only one who is imagining things. The news seems to actually be taking the situation seriously. No one could have put this situation into perspective better than Thompson who would've used the occasion to simply say, "We're doomed." 

Economic Disaster v. Designer Glasses

Upon returning home from class Wednesday afternoon, I expected CNN to be covering the financial meltdown and nothing but. This was the case during the first thirty minutes I watched of Wolf Blitzer's show The Situation Room. The Dow Jones Industrials had just dropped nearly 450 points after dropping over 500 on Monday. The market seemed near collapse after the bankruptcy filing of Lehman's Brothers, Bank of America buying out Merrill-Lynch, and now AIG, the nation's largest insurance group was being bailed out by the Federal government with an $85 billion loan. The television coverage was nail-biting. Wolf had all the best analysis and I'm pacing around my room watching the U.S. economy collapse live on television. TV hadn't been this riveting since the season finale of ABC's show Lost. 

Before cutting to a commercial, Blitzer gave a rundown of the upcoming segments on the show. First up after the break: a segment on Sarah Palin's in demand glasses. The mind reels in the absurdity of this. Largest economic downturn since the Great Depression or a candidate's high priced specs? Hmm, I thought the former would be a more popular topic. Alas, I watched the two minutes on Palin's glasses and how women everywhere are flocking to their closest LensCrafters to hunt down a pair of Palin's hot lenses. The segment left a negligible impact on my life and didn't make me love or hate Sarah Palin anymore than before. It left me a bit perturbed with the current state of our news. This could be the most turbulent time in the United States in quite some time and Americans are rightfully concerned. My pacing stopped, my brow raised and I said politely, "what the f***?"

Really Wolf? After the daily stress you cause me when you constantly pitch the new bestseller written by one of your cast, you show me this? Who in the editing room decided that, while the market may have reached the point of no return, let's squeeze in two minutes for glasses? Although my solace in all of this, the demand for these glasses might be the best part of the McCain/Palin economic plan. If that's the case, I may go ahead and pull my money out of the bank and put it in the mattress. 

This is another example of how the media tends to put the public's best interest behind what sells. While Palin's media star might have faded this week (sorry Sarah, the economy comes first) it beguiles me that someone actually thought this was a good idea. Now call me crazy, and too nitpicky, but I as an American have other priorities and NEED to be informed, now more than ever. We are less than fifty days from choosing a new President and the polls have these guys in a dead heat, and this is what you give me? At this point I wouldn't care if Palin had a similar ocular problem as the X-Men character Cyclops and shot bright red streaks out of her eyes that can cause massive destruction if it meant she had an answer for this economy. 

So for now Wolf and company, ask questions, get your analysts analyzing, and let's get America informed for once so that they'll know exactly who these candidates are not by what accessories they wear but how they are going to better America. Just ask people who actually wear glasses. They'll agree with me in a large majority. Trust me, people who wear glasses are scientifically known to be significantly smarter than those that don't.*

We have 46 days ladies and gentlemen until this insanely long show comes to an end. After that, we can discuss Palin's glasses, her clothes, and yes, even her lipstick, I don't care. Give me the issues, what's important and if you find out that Americans DO care about the specs, please, let me know. I'll laugh, then cry, and find another place to live, because that's the point I'll truly be frightened of our society. 

*There is no evidence that people that wear glasses ARE smarter than those that don't. This has been long rumored, especially among those that are nearsighted. Nearsightedness can cause your eyes to bulge out slightly, and we all know what causes this, a larger brain capable of understanding more. 

Fear, Panic & Gasoline: Hurricane Ike and the Media

OK, OK, this was published before I knew pipelines were broken and Ike screwed things up. People still freaked out. Oh well, read this as if it were fiction with some mix of truth. At least it's fun. Enjoy folks. Try to limit your driving.

It's the afternoon of Friday September 12th, 2008 and Hurricane Ike is bearing down on the Texas coastline. In its path: many of America's precious oil refineries. The news has been covering Ike for what seems like weeks as it trekked across the Atlantic, into the Caribbean, and onto the Gulf of Mexico. Much like when Hurricane Katrina threatened oil refineries and offshore oil rigs in 2005, Ike seemed poised to cause similar problems. All of the sudden, the news claims there may end up being a shortage of gasoline due to the impending doom of Ike. Panic ensued.

With supply seeming to be cut drastically, prices began to rise. With the threat of a shortage of gas, demand skyrocketed. I sat by idly watching terror set in. I had 3/4 of a tank, I'd be fine. I turned on the news on Friday afternoon to see prices rising and something I'd never seen before, stations running out of gas completely. I raised an eyebrow. 

"Maybe this is worse than I thought," I wondered. 

No, no, all a media sham. Around 5:30PM I left my house to take my brother to work to find traffic out into the streets with people attempting to fill up. Some stations had prices up 50-80 cents higher than they were just hours before and the less expensive stations looked more like the oil embargo of the 70s than in 2008. I thought this would pass. I then passed a series of stations, they had run out of gas. Caution tape created a perimeter around the pumps and prices had been taken down from the signs. The apocalypse set in. 

"This is what it's going to be like when gas truly runs out," I thought. "We're screwed."

I thought this would all pass and by Saturday morning things would return to normal, but upon seeing my first gas station that had gas around 8:30AM on Saturday, the line again was into the street. I wondered if these were the same people panicking yesterday and still waiting for a few precious gallons. More stations closed, the few remaining had raised prices anywhere from 60 cents to a whole dollar more per gallon. The media succeeded, they created mass hysteria.

Hurricane Ike brought destruction to the Texas coast, pounding Galveston and Houston leaving a swath of damage and by Saturday afternoon it had left its mark. As the news poured in about the damage in Texas, no one was sure about those crucial refineries. Once word came in, I laughed, no major damage reported, and gas would begin flowing without much in the way of continued problems. 

I didn't fill up. I was fine, at the time of this writing I am still on that same tank of gas, with just under a half a tank left. Gas, while more expensive than a week ago, is now flowing at most of the local gas stations and I'll fill up upon needed it. 

What is to be learned from this? We panic quickly and usually do not think things through when disaster is looming. The media quickly spreads information about a gas shortage and people lose it, promptly begin wasting gas by getting in their cars, drive to the nearest gas station and either sit in their cars burning fuel waiting to purchase more, or they drive around wasting even more fuel looking for a cheaper station or one that actually still has gas. As a society, we need to learn when it is appropriate to heed warnings from the media and when to use their messages to plan out accordingly. Rather than freaking out, I sat back and analyzed the situation, understood that it may or may not happen and conserve fuel rather than go hunting for more. Cut down on trips and the gas I have will get me places until the tankers show up much to everyone's delight. 

Oil has continued to drop, meaning the price increase from Hurricane Ike will probably fade quickly and drop below pre-Ike prices and then I'll fill up, knowing that I didn't let the media's panic and fear inducing reports get to me and hopefully save a few bucks than those who decided going to BP at 8AM on a Saturday was a great idea. 

A Somber Reminder

Yesterday marked the seven year anniversary of September 11th. The reminders were everywhere from television programs, memorial services, to every Major League Baseball team wearing "stars and stripes" hats to remember the tragic day. For what seemed like the first day since last 9/11, the presidential candidates also put campaign activities on hold to honor those lost and attended a ceremony at Ground Zero and put aside partisanship. 

Despite the large disagreements over recent years between Democrats and Republicans, yesterday we were all Americans, as we are everyday and it shouldn't take the anniversary of a national tragedy to remind us of that. The media put aside their political leanings to cover the ceremonies, even while Hurricane Ike began making it's treacherous track towards Texas. Everyday I am proud to be an American, and it is shame that it takes 9/11 for us to remember who we are and how patriotic we all are and can be. We argue, claim one side is more patriotic because of their political beliefs than the other. No one has an exclusive right to patriotism. It is something that we feel, believe in, love, and strive to achieve throughout our lives as Americans. Due to my political beliefs I have been told a number of times that I "don't support America" or I am not "a true patriot" or a defender of America. I have spent the last several months working on political campaigns, volunteering for that matter. Why? I am a patriot.

Ladies and gents, let's use this as a reminder of our duty to our country and whether we're liberal, conservative, Republican, Democrat, black, white, man, woman, Christian, Muslim, Jewish, we're all Americans, and we're all patriotic. Some may not wear a flag pin or wore their red, white, and blue yesterday, but they felt it. 

We all came to this land seeking the freedom and liberty all of our ancestors were seeking and it's about time we all are proud of that. So those that have differing views that I may, stand up with me and let us all be proud of being Americans. 

Missing the Story

  *
Last night John McCain accepted the Republican nomination for President of the United States. While a momentous occasion, the mainstream media has missed the story completely. Demonstrations have been taking place all week in the Twin Cities that have led to hundreds if not close to one thousand or more arrests of protesters. While many protesters were instigators, most were not, simply using their First Amendment right to Freedom of Speech. This is something that I take great pride in and seeing fellow young people express their voice only to be shut down is despicable. 

Even more disheartening is the total lack of mainstream media coverage this is receiving. If you scroll through the top stories on CNN.com, there is finally, now at the conclusion of the convention, a link letting you view a few videos of the protests that took place. Police arrested protesters, charged them with felony riot and have released most. While the severe charges will not stick, some face up to a year in jail for their actions. The media has remained silent. 

Protests began as soon as the convention started on Monday, overshadowed by coverage of Hurricane Gustav and came to a head on Tuesday evening. There was a music festival called the Ripple Effect Music Festival, which had all the proper permits to hold this festival in St. Paul on Tuesday. The popular band Rage Against the Machine, well known for their political activism, was scheduled to play the event. Upon attempting to take the stage, police prevented the band (who just recently reunited) from even taking the stage. The band took to the streets. Grabbing a megaphone, singer Zach de la Rocha and guitarist Tom Morello addressed the crowd about protesting peacefully and proceeded to perform two songs sans instruments. After the band left, police promptly arrested nearly 200 more protesters. 

Rage did get to play a show the following night, Wednesday at the Target Center in Minneapolis. Upon concluding the show de la Rocha told fans to leave peacefully. Not all did. Police in riot gear were waiting and promptly arrested after fans took to the streets and began protesting what de la Rocha called the "fascist Republican agenda." 

The protests for me became a bit more personal when a photographer from my former school, the University of Kentucky was arrested amidst the protesting this week. He was a photographer, press pass included. He was doing what any responsible journalist might do, cover the story. He was charged with felony riot. 

The media continued their silence all week. Now agree or disagree with the protesters taking to the streets, this was a story. A major one at that. The journalists that did take to the streets were being intimidated, threatened, and yes, even arrested. This prevents Freedom of the Press, Freedom of Speech, and is downright un-American. Pro-war, anti-war, pro-Bush, anti-Bush, Democrat, Republican, Liberal, Conservative, young, old, it doesn't matter folks. These were people that couldn't express their right to free speech because a few decided to spoil it for the many and the cops went overboard. Round up those that are causing destruction to property, interrupting the protests, or threatening police. Next time, I shouldn't have to look very hard to see police blasting a woman in the face with pepper spray or dragging someone through the streets. We did this in 1968, let's never do it again and shame on the media for shoving to the back page. 

Cops should be there to serve and protect. Arrest those that are causing a danger, but kids waving American flags calling for an end to the war giving you the peace sign? Why spray them? What did they do? Oh yeah, they decided to disagree with the establishment. They paid the price.  

*The picture is of Kentucky Kernel photojounrnalist Ed Matthews. He was photographing the protests and was not taking part in them. He was doing the job of the people we study in this class, reporting the news. At least he was trying to, and trying to do it honestly.